


Not So Secret Jealousy

by fallenandinlovewithhumanity



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Cas POV, Dean POV, Fluff, Implied Gabriel/Sam Winchester, Jealousy, M/M, POV Alternating, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-13
Updated: 2015-05-13
Packaged: 2018-03-30 08:27:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3929935
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallenandinlovewithhumanity/pseuds/fallenandinlovewithhumanity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Cas have been having a secret fling. But when Hannah sets Cas up on a date with Balthazar, Dean starts to rethink the nature of their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not So Secret Jealousy

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic, well one of my first. The POV (point of view) changes between Cas and Dean. I hope you like it.

 

 

"Hannah! I said no."  She's being insistent again. Hannah, my loving but ever so meddling cousin has decided that my being single is a matter to be fixed and her mission for the rest of this year.  
  
"Castiel, **please** just one date?"  
  
My god, if only she knew, if only. I don't want to go on a date not with Balthazar. I mean sure the guy is suave and sensual and has an accent that will make anyone swoon but he's not my cup of tea. He's the playboy, future philanthropist with the type of personality that can only be described as arrogant.  
  
"Please!"  
  
She's tugging at my sleeve like a five year old.  
  
"Fine!"  
  
Okay, yelling probably was not one of my better ideas. I seem to have called the attention of the entire student body. I look at the plethora of people who heard me, their attention going back to their conversations after a second. I catch the eyes of Dean Winchester, otherwise known as the reason I'm single. My best friend since age six, the green-eyed assbutt smirks at me and throws a wink. I turn back to Hannah.  
  
"Fine..okay one date. That is it. After that you leave me alone."  
  
"Deal. I'll go tell him."  
  
I watched her race down the hallway to find a Letterman wearing Balthazar, who proceeded to send me a smile and a wave.  The bell rings and the hallway becomes a cluster of bodies, I walk towards my next class, Gym with Dean.

* * *

  
  
"Fine!"  
  
I know that voice. I turn around and see Cas is talking to Hannah, well more like arguing with her. He looks over at me, those blue eyes making me automatically smile. A small tinge of pink is covering his cheeks, I sent him a wink.  
  
"Dean."  
  
Charlie calls from behind me. I forgot we were talking, dammit.  
  
"Sorry, Charlie." She rolls her eyes at me.  
  
"What do you think your angel's yelling about?"  
  
"He's not my angel..."  
  
"Right, treat me, your best friend like I don't know that you to have more unresolved sexual tension than any other people currently on earth. The ship sails itself my dear handmaiden."  
  
The bells rings. Oh thank god, I've been saved by the bell literally.  
  
"Gotta go, sorry my Queen I got gym and I can't be late."  
  
"Say hi to Castiel for me!" She said as I sprinted down the hallway, I may have flipped her off.  
  
I walked into the locker room. The smell is disgusting, the air smells of old socks, over used body spray, sulfur,  and a hint of rubber. I get to my locker, which happens to be conveniently next to Cas. He's stripping his shirt off and I can see his tattoos as he turns to get his gym clothes. A pair of black and blue wings expanding from his shoulder blades to his forearms, and a set of Enochian symbols. I can imagine just tracing the outline of those symbols over and over again. Okay, so maybe Charlie isn't totally off on the sexual tension thing, but she doesn't know everything. He turns once again and sees me.  
  
"Hey, Cas."  
  
"Hello, Dean." My name falls off his lips like it was meant to be there, and that smile, just wow.  
  
"So what were you and Hannah fighting about?"  
  
"She wants me to go on a date with Balthazar, I'm letting her have her way."  
  
Balthazar? You mean the asshole who plays every guy and girl who will give him the chance? I can't say anything to Cas. It's not like I have any claim over him. No. What him and I have, ugh what we do is complicated to say the least. Friends with benefits, is what we labeled it as and it sucks. It sucks because my dumb ass fell for him, and fell hard. Yeah I fell in love with my best friend, I flipping love the dorky little guy that wanted a "no strings attached" fling.  
  
"Oh...uh cool. I guess"  
  
I can't breathe. I need to get out of here,  I feel like crying or vomiting or both. I walk out of the locker room and into the gym, this is going to be a long class.  
  


* * *

  
  
Dean left without another word. Did the Balthazar thing bother him? No, it couldn't have bothered Dean, he's the one who said that we had a "no strings attached" fling and nothing else. Gym was awkward, for the lack of a better word. Dean and I usually sit together, and today he was on the other side of the room with Benny and Garth. Did I say something wrong? Dean and I have been in a secret relation---- I guess you can not call it a relationship if it's really not. I do not remember who initiated it, heat of the moment I suppose. "Hookups" as you would call them have been happening for the past few months, it was supposed to be no strings attached. I failed at keeping it that way from the first kiss. I have never been interested in anyone but Dean and it's frightening, I fear I may have fallen in love with him.  
  
I am experiencing an unrequited love and it is slowly killing me.  


* * *

  
  
"Mom, I'm home."  
  
She walked out of the dining room and gave me a hug.  
  
"Hey, kiddo how was school?"  
  
"It was... okay I guess."  
  
"I guess? Okay, well if you need me to listen. I'm here. Heard anything from Sammy?"  
  
"Thank mom, I'm fine I promise. Sammy's at dinner with Gabriel, said he might be home late."  
  
Mom nodded. Gabriel may be five years older than Sammy but Mom trusted him like a son. The Novaks moved in when I was six and Sammy was only two. Gabriel had an immediate liking to Sam and protected him ever since. Them dating now was a surprise to no one, not even Dad. Cas and I though, it took us a bit to actually be best friends. The first time I met him he scared me and pulled me around. I then hit him with a play sword and pretended I stabbed him in the chest, proclaiming I had killed him. And now here we are nearly twelve years later and I'm in love with him while he's planning a date with another guy.  
  
I can't lose him, I have to do something. Anything.  
  
_**New Message to Cas (the angel):**_  
_Hey sorry..._

* * *

  
  
My phone buzzes and nearly falls of my desk.  3 new messages.  
  
_**Message from Dean:** Hey sorry for ignoring you today_  
_**Message from Dean:** I was an ass and in a bad mood, shouldn't have taken it out on you._  
_**Message from Balthazar:** Hello, Cassie how bout tht date? Sat @ 8 maybe?_  
  
At least I know he's not mad at me. Thank god. I really need to get out of this date with Balthazar, I don't know why I let Hannah talk me into it, but how? Lying, that seems to work right? Its how people become president.  
  
_**Message to Dean:** It's okay, Dean. Do not apologize, did you want to talk about it?_  
_**Message to Balthazar:** Hello, Balthazar. I apologize but Hannah should not have talked to you on my behalf. I am not interested in "dating" at the moment._  
  
Okay, so that was a complete lie, I just was not interested in him. Within two minutes my phone buzzed twice.  
  
_**Message from Dean:** Not by text, talk tomorrow?_  
_**Message from Balthazar** : Your loss._

* * *

  
  
This is what is must feel like to be dying. Waiting by the phone for a reply and anxious about the answer. I mean I just asked him to talk tomorrow. My phone vibrates in my pocket. Oh thank god.  
  
_**Message from Cas (the angel):** Sure, I'll see you at Gym._  
  
Okay, how to tell you best friend you love him without losing him? How do you tell him not to go out with someone else without sounding like you're extremely jealous? I can't, it's not possible.. I have to do it tomorrow, I have to tell him. I can't go on like this, I can't handle watching all the couples at school acting like they just walked out of a chick-flick while I'm dying just to hold his hand in public. So tomorrow I either lose my best friend or I get to call him mine.  
  
****loud knocks on the door****  
  
"Dean wake up. We gotta go." Sam yelled as he pounded on the door, guess he made it home.  
  
I walk out of my room groggy and half-awake.  
  
"---- Woah! Gabriel put on some clothes man, why are you only in boxers... actually no don't answer that"  
  
At least I'm awake now, and I'm guessing that's why we're late. Question is why is Gabriel wearing...are those Loki boxers? Wow, I did not need that image so early in the morning.  
  
"Ahh come on Dean-o don't be a prude, you know you'd love to be with a Novak."  
  
Yes, Gabriel knew about my not-so-platonic feelings for his brother. Thanks, Sammy can't keep your mouth shut. Gabriel starts to walk back into Sammy's room when he stops and faces me.  
  
"Oh and Dean, just cause I tease you doesn't mean I don't care, or that I'm an assbutt as Castiel likes to call me, I do it cause you two idiots won't get your heads out of your asses and figure it out on your own." He walks back into Sam's room.  
  
Wait what? Two idiots? He can't possibly be talking about Cas can he? By the time we get to school the bell has already rung and Sammy bolted as soon as I was parked. Running right past Charlie on his way through the doors.  
  
"Hey Dean, guessing Sam's in a hurry."  
  
"Yeah, something about a big test or lab or something. Charlie, I got a problem."  
  
"How can I be of service?"  
  
"I'm serious, you gotta swear not to say anything."  
  
"I swear on Tolkien."  
  
"Okay... "  
  
Crap, this is hard to say and this is just to Charlie, how am I gonna say this to Cas?  
  
_"...someandcashavebeenfriendswithbenefitsformonthsandithinkilovehim."_  
  
"Dean, slow down I understood none of that."  
  
"I said me and Cas have been friends with benefits for months and I think I love him."  
  
Charlie's eyes widened, and she began to jump around.  
  
"I knew it! Destiel is canon bitches!" Charlie fist bumped the air and laughed.  
  
"Charlie he doesn't like me back."  
  
"What? Did you tell him? Does he know?"  
  
"No, and I shouldn't tell him. I mean he's going on a date with Balthazar. So I guess he's pretty much done with me, I guess it makes sense though how can I compete with Mr. Suave and British?"  
  
"Dean Winchester, you are an idiot. Of course Cas likes you. Why wouldn't he? You're awesome you know for a dude, besides it's no competition if I had to bang a guy it'd be you."  
  
Maybe she's right, I mean Cas wouldn't just leave me and whatever it is we have right? I have to talk to him, I have to tell him.  
  
"Haha, very funny. Should I tell him then?"

* * *

  
  
"Tell who what?"  
  
"I'm just gonna go now, yeah." Charlie walked away from us, looking back twice and giving Dean a glare.  
  
"What was that all about?"  
  
"Cas, I need to talk to you." Dean begins to pace and starts rubbing the back of his neck.   
  
"Of course Dean, you know how much I enjoy our talks."  
  
"I can't keep doing this."  
  
My heart stopped. What did I do?  
  
"Do what Dean?"  
  
"This, Us. I can't keep doing it Cas."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because Cas, you're going on a damn date with fucking Balthazar okay. That's why."  
  
"What does Balthazar have to do with this?"  
  
"He has everything to do with this Cas, you agreed to go out with him."  
  
"Dean, let me explain."  
  
"No, Cas I'm done, I'm sorry"  
  
"Dean..."  
  
Why won't he let me speak. He doesn't even know that I turned him down. That I said no, because of him.  
  
"I, I can't keep holding you back, you're never gonna feel the same so might as well stop it now."  
  
Did he just say, what I think he said?  
  
"The same? What do you mean the same?"  
  
"I mean, you are never gonna need me like I need you. You made that clear with the 'no strings attached' rule."  
  
He turns away from me, but I can still see his eyes, and the tears about to stream down his face. I'd do anything to never let him feel pain again. Wait, he thinks it was my rule? God, we're idiots.  
  
"Dean..."  
   
I grip his shoulder and turn him towards me.  
  
"What Cas? What can you say to make any of this better?"  
  
"I didn't follow that rule at all Dean. In fact I broke it day one."  
  
He looks up at me, those green eyes glistening as the tears threatened to fall.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I broke it Dean. The minute you kissed me, I broke it. I started to fall in love with you, you assbutt."  
  
I felt tears streaming down my face as I said it. It feel like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Dean looked at me for a minute as if I was lying.  
  
" You serious?" Did he not believe me? Of course I loved him, how could I not?  
  
"Yes, Dean I'm serious. I think I love you."  
  
 He hugged me. I hug back never wanting to let go. He settles his chin on my shoulder and whispers "I love you too Cas."  
  
And that's enough for me to push him away and kiss him. Not like we did every other time we kissed. This was different, it wasn't heated or rushed. It was filled with all the feelings that we both kept hidden for so long. It felt like coming home, like the world stopped around us and nothing else mattered. When he pulled away, a smile adored his face.  
  
"I guess you should cancel that date then, huh?"  
  
 I laugh and shut him up with another kiss. "Already done."

**Author's Note:**

> Did I do okay?


End file.
